It's all about Trust!

First, sorry not writing or posting anything for the past 2 weeks. I have to admit it is a challenge to keep up with this blog, but what keep me going are words of encouragement from fellow colleagues and readers like you. Thanks so much for your support!

In this posting, I want to talk and perhaps later discuss with readers on trust, which I feel one of the most important elements of leadership. To lead effectively, people must be able to trust you with your thought, words, decisions, and actions, or alternatively, as a leader you must inspire others to trust you! Without trust is as good as saying you are not a leader! Sound harsh, critical and cynistic. But, that's true!

Bryn Meredith in Bluepoint Leadership Development blog (http://www.bluepointleadership.com/blog/bryn-meredith/can-you-still-be-trusted/) wrote,

"If people do not trust you, everything else you do as a leader becomes inconsequential. Forget trying to be inspirational, coach-like, innovative, supportive, a team leader, or visionary. If you do't have people's trust, they may do what you tell them because you have positional authority, but you will not get the passionate engagement that is the result of true leadership"

Stephen R. Covey, in his book, The Speed of Trust, said,

"Low trust is an unseen cost in life and business because it creates hidden agendas and guarded communication, thereby slowing decision-making. A lack of trust stymies innovation and productivity. Trust, on the other hand, produces speed because it feeds collaboration, loyalty and ultimately, results"

Further, Stephen R. Covey, in an interview in his blog (http://www.stephencovey.com/blog/?p=13), said,

"Trust is the lifeblood of all relationships, of all transactions, and is so foundational and fundamental to everything in life"

By now we have established that trust is important. But, how do we inspire and build trust? If people had lost trust in us, can we regain it back?

Let's continue to read excerpt from Covey's interesting interview in his blog:

Q: Help us understand the behaviors that reduce trust.

A: The metaphor I’ve used that I have found very helpful to people is an Emotional Bank Account. It’s like a financial bank account into which you can make deposits and take withdrawals. And if you get into a situation where you are constantly making withdrawals-the kinds that I have just been speaking about-you get an overdrawn Emotional Bank Account. And we all know what happens with a bank relationship when you have an overdrawn account. It kills your freedom, your flexibility, and your credit capacity.

Q: What behaviors increase trust? Is it a skill I can learn?

A: Absolutely. It is not just a skill you can learn, it is a character trait that you have to develop. It is not a technique you can just pick up. You have to be trustworthy in your heart and sincere about what your real intentions are so that you can be transparent. You’re not fearful of being “found out” doing something in the dark when you’re proclaiming something else in the light. The most important of all deposits into the Emotional Bank Account of trust is empathy, because empathy, or listening to another within his or her frame of reference, tells you what the important deposits are to that person. Every person is different. So you have to figure out what is important to them-how do they interpret kindness, consideration, and respect? How do they interpret making and keeping promises? How do they interpret any other positive deposit in the Emotional Bank Account? This is all a function of empathy, and it is the same with customers, with your associates in the business, and with your business partners. The key is to always develop a relationship that produces Win/Win Agreements, so the feeling is that everyone wins. But to do that, you have to deeply listen to other people to find out what the win is for them.

Q: Is it possible to regain someone’s trust? How?

A: It is absolutely possible to regain their trust, but to do so, you have to right the wrongs you’ve done; you have to apologize; you have to seek forgiveness; you have to try to make reconciliation in every way you can. But if you are in a state of denial and don’t have the humility to admit that you’ve made a mistake, then you’ve just taken another withdrawal and people will come to not trust your apologies and your asking for forgiveness.